"If Music Be the Food of Love..."

...Then let it also be remembered that one man’s meat is another man’s poison.

What’s the deal the chapel’s organ music?

Aside from the pointless ritual of sitting and standing whenever it’s played (no doubt a cruel and cunning Wesleyan technique used to determine if anyone in the congregation had fallen asleep/died during the sermon) things have been going downhill since the beginning of the year. When we first arrived, the music was blaringly loud, excruciatingly antiquated, and puritanically solemn- the musical equivalent of having a brick smashed into your face.

Difficult to imagine that it could get any worse.
And of course, it did.

The music is still as loud as ever (if not louder) but any sense of antiquity and austerity has been lost (if not murdered and thrown into a ditch from a moving car). Now the music best resembles the frantic and twisted music you’d see in a horror movie set in a cursed amusement park. The weird (let’s admit it- just plain freaky) music that we hear as we shuffle out of chapel sounds like it was written by a demented clown from some hellish carnival.

J.S. Bach is rolling around in his grave right now.
Seriously, doesn’t this merit the administration’s attention? The way things are going, the organist must either be knocking back snifters of LSD or having his soul ripped out of body every time he plays (or every time she plays- I’m not sure which). Rehab or exorcist- it matters not; the point is that the chapel has no right to play god by punishing us this way. It’s bad enough that we’re forced to attend, you think they’d show some humanity and spare us the tri-weekly renditions of pained animals being strangled by their own digestive tract.

For the love of heaven, Houghton, there’s a reason why pipe organs are portrayed as appearing in vampyric crypts , the lairs of opera phantoms, and super-villain hideouts (at least they try to play decently). Let the facts be faced, if you don’t have any good songs to play, it’s best not to play anything at all.